Strong relationships at work and in life start with empathy. When you show real understanding, others feel safe. They open up more. They trust you more.
Many people only say “uh-huh” or “mm-hmm” when someone speaks. Those sounds can seem lazy. Better is to use short, real sentences that show you heard and understand. We call these short sentences Empathizers.
What is an Empathizer?
An Empathizer is a short sentence you say to show you understand another person’s view or feeling. It is more than noise. It proves you listen. It helps the speaker feel heard and respected.
Good Empathizers are full sentences. They replace weak sounds like “uh” or “yeah” with clear words that match what the person is saying.
Match the person’s language (senses & feelings)
People describe things in different ways. Some use sight words, some use sound, some use feeling words. Match their words.
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Visual (sight) — use: “I see what you mean.”
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Auditory (sound) — use: “I hear you.” or “That sounds great.”
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Kinesthetic (feeling/body) — use: “I can understand how you feel.”
Matching shows you pay close attention to how they think and feel.
15 Empathic Phrases to Use Right Now
For general validation and understanding
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“I see what you mean.”
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“I can appreciate why you decided to do that.”
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“That was the honorable thing to do.”
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“That really is exciting.”
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“That’s a lovely thing to say.”
For matching sensory or emotional language
6. “I hear you.” — (for sound or tone)
7. “You really have a clear picture of that situation.” — (visual)
8. “That sounds great.” — (auditory)
9. “I can understand how you feel.” — (feeling)
10. “You have a good grasp of that problem.” — (feeling/understanding)
For neutralizing conflict and deep sympathy
11. “I don’t blame you one iota for feeling as you do.”
12. “If I were you I would undoubtedly feel just as you do.”
13. “I’m sorry that happened to you.”
14. “That must have hurt.”
For active listening and clarification
15. “Let me make sure I understand.” — Use this to start a short summary of what the speaker said.
How to use these phrases (quick tips)
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Say a short Empathizer after the person finishes a point.
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Use the one that matches their words. If they talk about seeing, say “I see.” If they talk about feeling, say “I can understand how you feel.”
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Use “Let me make sure I understand” before you repeat their point in your own words. This is called looping for understanding. It proves you heard correctly.
Examples
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Speaker: “I felt ignored in that meeting.”
You: “I can understand how you feel. Let me make sure I get it: you felt left out because no one asked you to speak?” -
Speaker: “The new system sounds confusing.”
You: “I hear you. What part feels most confusing?”
When someone feels angry, sad, or upset, logic alone does not help. Emotions matter. Saying an Empathizer softens the moment. It lowers defenses. It makes people more open to solutions. Using kind, real phrases saves time, builds trust, and avoids fights.
Also watch the person’s energy. If they look angry, match the intensity briefly and then calm the tone. If they are quiet and sad, lower your voice and be gentle. Matching mood and energy proves you truly heard them.
Empathy is a skill you can learn. Simple phrases that show you truly listen will help people trust you. Use sensory matching and looping to make your conversations stronger. These short Empathizers make a big difference.